Seeing Tallulah In A New Light, Through The Eyes Of Nigel!

Since Sandra has spending more and more time in her soon to be new office, Darrell and I have re-allocated certain of our tasks to Nigel, like taking the rush photocopying jobs and the mail to Tallulah’s office (which is Sandra’s new base too) !! A stroke of delegating genius on our behalf we felt!

However, over the weeks Nigel has developed a great fondness for Tallulah and she for him, and he is always begging for any jobs which might mean he can go and see her.

Nigel, it appears has bought out Tallulah’s hitherto unseen soft and nurturing nature and she has untold patience with him.

We are used to his jibber jabbering, but have to admit that at times we don’t have a clue what he is on about and sometimes have to guess what he is saying …. but Tallulah seems to understand every single thing he says and spends ages just listening to him and talking softly to him in her rich smoky voice.

She has always got a few sweeties waiting for him and has told Sandra that she looks forward immensely to Nigel popping in to see her. I even think they have a little walk planned in the school grounds before the end of term so Tallulah can show Nigel all nature that is springing up …. who would have thought it?

Gardening Wars With Darrell And Nigel!

There is a robust rivalry betwixt Darrell and Nigel of an Alan Titchmarsh type variety at work at the moment

Darrell has taken responsibility for the amaryllis in our office, it has a firm and strong stem and at the moment seems to grow by several centimetres a day, but is sparse in the foliage department …….

Nigel has been awarded growers rights and tenderage of the amaryllis in the Finance Office.  His plant  is taller than Darrell’s, with two heads and a whole plethora of strong leaves.

Both Darrell and Nigel are hell bent that their amaryllis will be the first to burst forth and bloom and are thus applying their own growth stimulation techniques to their said plants.  Darrell likes to stroke his stem at least once a day, encouraging it with kind words and tender looks.

Nigel on the other hand likes to lie back and gaze up at his burgeoning flora.  It’s almost as if he is making a spooky telepathic Derek Acorah type connection with it ……. willing it to grow and do him proud!

But who’s plant is best ……..????
I like Nigel’s two pronged prodigy, but on the other hand I also admire Darrell’s single thrusting shoot!  I shall keep you informed of any further developments of any blooming type nature ….. it’s all so very exciting!

Darrell Does Cake!

Sancha the Food Department Lady is very partial to Darrell’s company and had baked him  a sponge cake made with fresh raspberries, white chocolate butter cream and sparkly bits sprinkled on the top.

Now …… we think that Darrell was perhaps meant to bring the cake home to share …. “But one slice sort of lead to another” he declared “And, it was very moreish, so before I knew it …. eleven slices had disappeared, just like that,  without even touching the sides ……”

“And to leave just one slice would have looked rude!”

What is he like?”

Brian Is Found!

At six o’clock yesterday Chateau Castle Greyskull was thronged with great joy and glad tidings as Brian was found. Darrell was Hero of the Hour after discovering Brian behind the biscuit boxes!

We think that Nigel had nocturnal stirrings of a midnight snack type nature and had got up in the middle of the night ………

……taking Brian with him, in order to find sustenance and then in his urgency to get back to bed quickly without being discovered he had forgotten Brian whilst preoccupied and encumbered by a hob nob!

We should have put two and two together, because when we robustly turned over Nigel’s bed in our search for Brian, as we did find a rather ample expanse of crumbs between the sheets, but there again hindsight is a wonderful thing ….!

However, all is well again, peace reigns  once more chez nous and Nigel’s appetite has now returned akimbo…… but we are now looking into ways of putting a lead on Brian to prevent another such traumatic occurrence happening again.

Celebrity Big Brother 2012 – Venting Our Reality Spleen!

“Celebrity Big Brother: Viewers cry fix as Twins survive DOUBLE eviction, Romeo done”

Though we don’t often become embroiled in matters of a national importance type nature, we felt compelled to voice our concerns about the (in our opinion) shonky voting in Celebrity Big Brother this year, which although we haven’t mentioned it much, we have been following robustly.

When Natalie was evicted shockingly last week we were very upset because we had 50p on her to win. We had also refrained from voting to early as we are only allowed five votes per reality series, and as we were certain that Natalie would make it to the final five we were saving our votes to make her our winner.

Needless to say when she was evicted, our hearts were not in it as much as they had been.

Imagine our further dismay then when on Wednesday night we were fully expecting the pouting, hair fiddling Toxic Twins to be out after the Denise and “Pantsgate”  debacle, only to see Romeo evicted …. we were shocked to the core, as he has been so inoffensive. We felt he had given sage advice to Frankie and looked after the ladies when they were drunk emotional in the Jacuzzi. Whereas the twins have been very media savvy and constantly plotting and planning their victory in the toilet and behind their sunglasses.

Anyway, disgruntled we decided to look on the CBB Forum and saw that others were up in arms too that the twins still remained and we decided to leave a comment too. It won’t make any difference, but we will save enough money from not voting to buy a substantial amount of Pringles and Maltesers to nom on while watching the live final …… which we now hope Gareth will win!

Still No Sign Of Brian …

Nigel is still in a terrible state ….. Brian is still AWOL.

Darrell has suggested that we hypnotise Nigel and regress him, but I am frightened that we could regress him too far …….

…… and find out that Nigel is the reincarnation of a poor serf from the 16^th century, who was hung and then sent to Australia for stealing a pig to feed his starving family …. or some such tale of a tragic type nature, which could then unleashed all manner of dire psychological consequences for Nigel and us!

Where is Derek Acorah when we need him? If only we could give him a piece of the blanket that Nigel wrapped Brian up in, he would surely be able follow Brian’s physic scent and track him down …… or have I got my ley lines crossed and confused Derek’s mystical and spooky powers with that of a bloodhound?

A Distraught Nigel ….

The past twenty four hours at Chez Chateau Castle Greyskull have been traumatic to say the least ………, Nigel’s mouse “Brian”, the one that Father Christmas left him at Christmas has gone missing. Nigel has hardly ever let Brian out of his sight since, but somehow he has been mislaid (or escaped?) and just cannot be found.

Needless to say Nigel is beside himself, pining away and totally inconsolable, fretting that he’ll never see Brian again.

We have turned his bedroom upside down, several times, as well as most of the rest of the house.

We have asked him all the usual questions like “When did you last have Brian?”, “Where did you last see him?”, “Have you taken him anywhere out of the usual?” but all he does is sob and say, we think, “I don’t know”

We can’t bear to see Nigel so distressed ….. his meals have gone untouched since he realised that Brian was gone ….. what on earth can we do ……….?

Darrell’s Man Boobs

Good grief, living in this house is never easy ….

Darrell is convinced he has got “man boobs” and has been spending far too much time in the bathroom looking at them.

He’s even thrust them at  asked my opinion on them and whether I think he has them. To be honest I am not that comfortable at looking at his or anyone else's chesticle area for that matter, but when I did take a squirmish sideways peek I told him that he was being silly and that his chest was perfectly normal, quite manly in fact, and suggested that a small medallion might set it off nicely! 

I think my firm, no nonsense response has put paid with Darrell’s bodily insecurities and he has stopped pulling his trousers up in a Simon Cowell type way in an effort to hid his erm …imaginary bosom!

DIY Stores …. To Be Honest … Are A Bit Boring!

Both Darrell and I are strangers to DIY stores such as B & Q and Wickes, browsing their long shelves holds no pleasure for us! Fortunately we have Andy to do stuff of a manly domestic type nature such as unplugging drains, changing light bulbs  and erecting things with wood and stuff……

However Darrell is not adverse to the odd trip to the aforementioned type shop, especially if Andy has requested help to carry screws or coupling joints things.

Darrell knows that Andy likes to be left alone while he is making his selections so he tends to wander around trying to find something of interest amongst the plethora of DIY products … but this has been known to lead to unfortunate situations ……

…… and fits of  the giggles, like when he saw these wooden stakes and wondered out aloud about the size of the vampire a stake of this mahooosiveness would kill and then theoreticised about the strength  needed to thrust such a stake into the said vampires heart, causing Andy to sigh greatly.Just like he did when Darrell also mused as to whether Derek Acorah knew you could get white spirit in a bottle!

I think Andy sometimes pretends Darrell isn’t with him until he  is ready to pay, and then has to search aisle after aisle looking for him,  last time  he found Darrell with his nose right up against a stack of wooden planks ….. inhaling deeply ….

….. saying that the aroma of freshly felled timber was most romantic and made him think of lumberjacks????!!!!!   What is he like?

The Magic Of A Polaroid Camera

Darrell has been given an old Polaroid camera that still works. And I, he announced grandly, was to be his muse!
It’s a magical, yet at the same time, a spooky experience to see the images develop before your very eyes.

Darrell now fancies himself as a bit of a David Bailey

What is he like?