Always Something To Do In The Holidays

Our village is a wash at the moment with posters in shop windows with romantic things to do in the Easter holidays ……

Nigel for example has been pestering us about going to the “Own a Pony Day” at the near by stables, but neither Darrell and I think it would be a wise activity taking into consideration Nigel’s diminutive size ….. it would be heart breaking if he were to be inadvertently mistaken, by a ravenous pony, for a Granny Smith apple in his green jumper …. and so have advised him that a day such as this would be best undertaken and enjoyed when he has grown a little bigger ……

I, on the other hand am rather taken by the opportunity of partaking in an evening with David Starkey a renowned and local clairvoyant and psychic,  especially as a hot pork sandwich is included in the price of the ticket …… however, it might appear a little disloyal to our clairvoyant and psychic of choice Derek Acorah …… so perhaps I should too also refrain!

And Darrell …..???? Well, he says there is “No way on God’s green earth” that he will be attending one of the Drop-In Police Surgeries …… they may know an ample sufficiency about crowd control at the Sunday league football matches down on the local playing fields and indeed it is a comforting sight to see our village Bobbies pounding our streets and advising the local youth that it would, perhaps, not be sensible  to hijack and ride around in the trolleys kept outside the Tesco Express. ….. But what do they know about him being a martyr to the verruca that is presently afflicting the heel of his left foot or the current slowness of his bowels – NOTHING! And ………  he has no intention of coughing for anyone, even if he does say he is the Chief Constable with a current First Aid certificate! Good Grief!