Nigel Finds ……

Before and during every school run Nigel always has high hopes that he’ll find something interesting or useful to break up the now, all too familiar, trek home.

To be honest, the walk has been pretty lack lustre since the start of the school year, but yesterday, fingers crossed, things began to look up when they found a box of apples going free on the wall outside one of the houses. 

Well, who doesn’t need an extra boost of fresh vitamin C as the autumn starts to take hold, not to mention it looking most rude not to avail oneself of such a generous offer.

So the little band of “Merry Men” took one apple each to crunch, in between all their natterings, for the rest of their journey. 

Nigel said that they were very lovely apples indeed, crisp and sweet, and they were all hoping the box would still be there tomorrow and perhaps now their barren run of “discovery” was finally about to get started!

The Decorated Bikes Of Evesham

It seems that all Nigel’s beloved decorated Evesham bikes, part of the Vale Active Art Project, have now been gathered together……..

…….. and put on display in the empty H Samuel shop in the town’s shopping arcade.

Some he’d seen many times before on his travels……

…… while others were strangers to him, but it was lovely to see them finally all together.

Most of the bikes are now available to bid on as part of an online auction with the proceeds going to Evesham Adventure Playground ……..

….. an organisation very close to our hearts as Iris and Bertie have spent many happy days there in the past two years taking part in their Summer Play Scheme.

Unfortunately, although Nigel is absolutely desperate to put in a bid for the bike with the very generous sweetie box attached to the front, for very obvious reasons ……..

…….. The Towers is just too bijoux to keep one, but I’m sure we’ll be able to find another way of supporting the Adventure Playground in the very near future ……..

…….. as a small thank you, for all of this and last summers happy childhood memories.

Darrell Goes All Autumnally Lawrence Llewelyn Bowen

With the end of September looming, Darrell confessed that he was feeling very autumnally remiss with his seasonal décor, to be honest, he’d done absolutely nothing, which was something he knew Hugh, his best friend and mentor of all things “autumnal hue” would give him a disapproving tutting for.

So yesterday morning, with this in mind, he caught the bus up to The Range, returning with a bulging carrier and in the afternoon, while Nigel was on the school run, he said he was going “a-foraging”, again returning with a full sack.

Then this morning he was like a demon with a hot glue gun possessed! “The Towers” he announced “was not going to be found wanting in any way, shape or form as far as the season was concerned!”  What is he like?

After a couple of hours and several burnt fingers (fortunately, nothing too serious or incapacitating), though not completely comfortable with the floral arts, despite many hours of tutorship from Hugh, he was pretty triumphant.

Hanging it on the door and examining it carefully from all possible angles …….

…… he proclaimed it was indeed fit to grace our portal and perhaps just enough to niggle our miserable neighbour upstairs, who doesn’t really like such things!

The boy dun good …….. now what about the rest of The Towers Darrell?

Nigel Reviews Imperial Leather Monkey Business Shower Gel.

After Michelle’s suggestion that Nigel should really try out and review the Monkey Business shower gel he’d spotted in Home Bargains last week, it would have looked rude not to, even though we are more used to critiquing products of a comestible type nature ……

….. where compulsory nakedness isn’t really a requisite,  but on the firm understanding that Darrell wouldn’t take any photos lower than his upper chest, (no matter how tempting), Nigel was stripped off before you could say “jungle paradise”.

Nigel’s first observation was that he doubted very much that any jungle would smell quite as fragrant in real life, he imagined a real one might come across as a lot more earthy and “of nature” …….

……. but as a complete stranger to guava blossom and jungle leaves who was he to quibble.

It lathered up well and cleaned the little fella’s bits up a treat, but he noted that he didn’t feel as if he’d been teleported in a spooky Derek Acorah sort of way to any jungle paradise, which sounded more like artistic licence to him, but for only 99p, it really wasn’t worth getting in touch with Trading Standards for.

However, bless him, he did come out of the shower feeling, as Darrell will attest, soft all over and very delicately perfumed of whatever ……..

……… with Nigel saying it had done the job as the before and after shots show!  What is he like?

What Are They Like?

The things you do when a much beloved niece inadvertently leaves their “cuddly” behind after a day at yours ……..

……. and is worried that they (the aforementioned Cuddly) might be sad and missing their night night story and snuggles! 

Products Of A Monkey Type Nature ……..

Well ………

……it would look rude not to avail oneself of any monkey product we, to be honest, rarely happen upon  …….

…… especially when a certain little fella is more than a little curious as to what said bottled “Monkey Business” actually smells like/of!  What is he like?

Best Not To Tell Nigel ....... or Darrell ……..

We seem to have some sort of mahoooosive praying mantis type creature, with scarily long testicles tentacles antenna, preying praying next to the door of our communal entrance.

I quickly came to the decision that it might be wise to keep such a discovery to myself ………

….. as undoubtedly Nigel will want to keep it as an unusual pet and Darrell will have an attack of the vapours on sight, be it left peacefully where it is, or dare I say, kept hostage captive in Nigel’s bedroom.

What are they both like?

Darrell’s Long Felt Want ……..

Darrell came back from town this morning absolutely buzzing, he’d gone out for a couple of pounds of new potatoes and some AAA batteries ………

……. but returned triumphant with a brand new facial sauna! Well, it would have been rude not to, seeing as one has  been on his beauty bucket list for as long as I can remember. He said it was sat sitting on the charity shop shelf just beckoning to him and at £4.99 it was an absolute steal, adding that it was an emotional and pivotal moment in his life!

To be honest, I haven’t seen much of his face since he got in  ………

……..  and he says the results, even after such a short time, are totally unbelievable, his pores haven’t looked looked so refined since Hugh had a go with them last time he was at Le Chicken Coop………

……. which is all very wonderful, but how do I ask him if/when he’s going to go back to town for the aforementioned new potatoes and batteries or shall I just go and get them myself instead?

Nigel Finds ……. More Heartache

  Nigel has found even more heartbreak on the streets of Evesham ……

…… this time in the guise of a sad, lonely, lost lion, but ,Nigel noted, still putting a brave face on his situation.

Nigel carefully put him in a place where said lion could be easily seen, should someone come by retracing their steps. Nigel was filled with worry for the little one who had dropped it and the sleepless nights they (and their parents) might be having through its absence and loss.

Sometimes, I think life would be much simpler for all concerned if Nigel just concentrated on finding the ordinary or curious, an unwanted sofa, chest of drawers or even, dare I say, a wallet with the odd false tooth in, are soon forgotten once mused over by the little fella, but having to deal with an onslaught of emotion with the more poignant and personal “found thing”  does rather take a toll on his heart!  What are we to do with him?

Time To Say Goodbye ………….

Time to hang up your handbag, put your feet up and rest lovely, lovely lady.

Charles won’t look half as good as you in pearls or diamonds ….. or a crown …… but hey ho! 

Nigel Is Sorely Tempted …….

Nigel is finally back to listening to his beloved Year 2 Readers, twice a week in school, he’s missed it and them soooooooooooooo much.

However, in between hearing readers, the little fella has been sorely tempted by the contents of the children’s healthy morning snack baskets …….

Now, he can steal himself from the odd  banana, pear or apple ………

……. but this week they’ve had little bags of peas in the pod and if there’s anything that Nigel loves more and can’t resist,  it’s a flipping good pea and popping their pods in the hope of finding the penultimate, super sweet,  plump one!

Bertie has promised Nigel he’ll choose peas when he knows Nigel is in school next and then smuggle a couple out for him in his book bag …… what is he like? Like uncle like nephew!

Even More Bikes Of Evesham

Just as you’re sure you’ve spotted all the decorated bikes there are in Evesham ……….

…… another couple pop up ………

……. where you’re absolutely positive they weren’t before.

However, Nigel has had to admit that very lovely and imaginative though they all are ……..

….. they don’t quite match up to the ones outside the Valkyrie, in the market square on Biker’s Night!

And no Nigel, you can’t have one, no matter how cute you think you’d look in full leathers and personalised helmet!