Saturday 31 October 2015

Mr Kipling, A Perfect Start To Halloween?

Despite his pledge of allegiance to mainly eat Mr Kipling Witches Hats this Halloween ……
Nigel has now discovered Mr Kipling Toffee Terror Whirls (same price £1) ………
…… which, he says, are equally moreish, but, in a completely different sort of way, i.e a filled shortcake biscuit as opposed to an iced sponge, two completely different textures and, in his opinion  a perfect way to start of, what he hopes will be a most excellent night of trick or treating!
I have to say the Terror Whirls appeal to me a little more than the aforementioned Witches Hats, but then, Nigel tells me that I am a bit stuck in my ways and a bit old fashioned as regards to the “latest trends in comestible flavouring combinations” …… Hmmmmmmm, I think perhaps Hugh has been giving Nigel the benefit of his “expert fine dining tutorage!” Heaven help me!!!!

Friday 30 October 2015

And So …. Hugh Embraces Zee Journey From Wolverhampton To Evesham

Hugh couldn’t remember the last time he had travelled by train (if ever), helicopters; mais qui, chauffer driven limo; assurĂ©ment  ….. and as for having to buy ones own ticket, well, on this occasion  he just sat aghast and watched Darrell do it for him (just this once), commenting on how clever Darrell was, with “….. all zees routes and all zee changey wangey things! My ‘ed” he said “Is, ‘ow you say, done in, no?”!!!!!!
IMG_6273We thought, as this was Hugh’s first time,  it would be best if Hugh was accompanied by Nigel, who is now an expert expert in the intricacies of the four change route!!!IMG_6270Hugh was at once fearful, on reaching the first station, to find out that not only had they to negotiate four changes of train, but that they may also have to face the peril of fallen leaves ….. and hopefully, not the wrong sort of fallen leaves!!!!
IMG_6275But Nigel told him to chill and just make sure he didn’t let loose of their tuck bag full of carefully selected snacks to nibble on, en-route.
IMG_6277The first journey from our village to Wolverhampton was only 9 minutes, so not long enough to get all that peckish, or on the other hand, need a sick bag. On arrival, Nigel told Hugh, that the next train was “in” so it would be a seamless “off one, on to another” operation.
IMG_6279On the Wolverhampton to Galton Bridge leg of their journey (another 10 –12 minutes or so), Nigel almost fell of his seat when Hugh asked when the stewardess would be along to check if they needed anything, as he wouldn’t mind a blanket to keep ‘is legs warm and that an ‘ed rest wouldn’t go amiss,  to which Nigel responded with an incredulous  “Huuuuuuuuuuuuugh …… what are you like??????”
IMG_6283There was about a 20 minutes wait at their next station, Galton Bridge, a maze of stairways and lifts and platforms on two levels over a canal!!! Nigel dragged the suitcase along, while Hugh meandered with their tuck bag, musing that cruises on Simone Cowelle’s yacht around the med were romantic and  exciting, yes, but nothing to compare to this!
IMG_6286The Galton Bridge to Worcester Shrub Hill journey was pretty quiet, and the longest part of their journey on one train, so, what better place to avail themselves of a snack or two ……. “Only one more train (Worcester to Evesham) and then a short walk to Snake Mountain!” sighed Nigel ….. dreaming of being on one of Hugh’s helicopter rides!!!! Hugh was lovely …….. but quite, quite exhausting!!!

Thursday 29 October 2015

Joyous News Of Jan The Fan ……

Yesterday we received a postcard from our No.1 Fan, Jan the Fan, she had had some wonderful, and joyous news to impart ……
…….. she has become a mother (again) ……. having taken the mahooooooosively momentous decision to adopt a poor, abandoned neglected and unloved mite ………..
…….. but not of the human variety,  she’s adopted a donkey, to wit William D, he is sooooooo cute, let’s just say our hearts melted as soon as we saw his picture….. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!
We have sort of likened it to our taking Hugh to our collective bosom, although we prefer to think of it as fostering, rather than a full blown adoption (well, hopefully), and Hugh, of course, has two legs instead of four and lacks a swishy tail!
Sadly, Jan the Fan can’t actually take William D home with her, which, although she might miss the cuddles, she won’t need to purchase a humungous amount of carrots from Tesco Online each week AND neither will she have to shovel a “certain something” off her patio or decking!I could see that Darrell was filling up and getting that soppy look that frequently makes his eyes cross …….. but I have told him, in no uncertain terms that under no circumstances are we considering adding a donkey to our entourage, especially not when we presently have both Hugh and Nigel under our roof!!!!

Wednesday 28 October 2015

A Bit Of A Message For Pharmacy Michelle

Pharmacy Michelle could you contact us please on our e-mail address monkeyanddarrell@hotmail.co.uk – we need something from you ……… but not of a pharmaceutical type nature!!!!

Tackling A Pithy Subject

It’s seems like Hugh has been with us forever, he has perked up quite considerably, but he has not shown any sign of wanting to return to his showbiz life in Notting Hill, which has put us in a “slight” quandary regarding our frequent toing and froing to Evesham to help look after Baby Iris.
So, yesterday, Darrell and I decided to sit Hugh down to tentatively ask about any plans he might have. He said that he still didn’t feel up to zee bright lights just yet, but, that his agent had told him that he had some interesting propositions on the table, including a stint in the jungle …….. which he was considering, but in “zee” mean time, could he possibly stay with us just a tiny weeny insy bit longer. Well, what could we say??????
But then, we felt we had to throw Evesham in the mix. How did Hugh feel about sharing a few baby minding duties with us and spending part of the week in the aforementioned Garden of England?  Hugh went very quiet, you could tell he was thinking. “I ‘ave never been to zee Evesham, alzough, it is not too far from my County Pile no?” he replied “It could be zee big adventure no? But ……. I ‘ave not zee experience with zee babies, zay are a bit of, how you say, an enigma to me no?, Ooooooo la la!” He politely excused himself, got up, and said he was just going for zee little walk, to “clear ‘is ed”!
Which left Darrell and I worried that, perhaps, we had, unwittingly, sent Hugh back to square one  ….. with talk zee babies, no!!!!!!!!
So, all we could do was wait anxiously for Hugh’s return.
But we didn’t have to wait long before Hugh's triumphant return, he had nipped to the shops and had come back with presents for Baby Iris. Yes, he would love to come to zee Evesham with us …..
…… and, with his much considered choice of gifts he said he could help Iris learn all that he knew about fine dining, hosting the perfect dinner party and how to take afternoon tea!!!!!!!! What is he like?
He had also bought Iris some little Nordic style socks, which he said were so on trend this season that it was absolutely ridicuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuulous!  And Iris was going to be sooooooooooooo on trend if he had anything to do with it!
So, I guess that’s settled, Hugh is joining us officially on our frequent jaunts to Evesham ……. how robustly exciting is that???????

Tuesday 27 October 2015

A Most Romantic And Apt Moon Especially At The Time Of Year ……

Last night Nigel popped over to the shops to get the local evening paper and another box of Mr Kipling Witches Hat (£1 a box), when he noticed the moon …….
Our pictures don’t do it any justice at all, because in real life it was mahoooosively large and a bright, bright (please pardon the expression) bloody red ……..
Nigel said that though it was undoubtedly very romantic, he also thought that it might be “….an omen of an untowardly foreboding type nature ……..
……… indicative of the days as they draw closer and closer to Halloween!”I really don’t know where he gets his imagination from ….. but just in case we have put a jar of “easy garlic” in the porch of Castle Greysquirrell to ward off any rampant marauding warlocks and vampires.  We had to use a jar of easy garlic as we have run out of  fresh garlic cloves, fingers crossed the “easy” variety works just as well!!!

Monday 26 October 2015

Tis The Season …….

Tis the season of Halloween according to Nigel, which is “a very most excellent reason” he says …… for dusting off and donning the wonderful Halloween Pumpkin outfit Dianne, our very special friend, who lives in romantic and sunny Florida sent to him last year.
And, because “Tis the Season”, Nigel has also announced that he will be mostly eating Mr Kipling Witches Hat Fancies ….. among other festive delicacies.
Now, I am no connoisseur of Halloween baked comestibles, but I am afraid orange flavoured green sponge with vanilla topping and black fondant icing, leaves me feeling a little queasy.  However, Nigel assures me that they are “Gooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrgeousssssssssssssssssss!” What is he like?

Sunday 25 October 2015

Down Amongst Zee Scareycrows, No?

Would you believe it, Darrell’s friend Hilary called him to say that she hoped he hadn’t forgotten that the Pattingham Scarecrow Festival was on this weekend …….
IMG_5427……. well, with all the upheaval of Hugh’s unannounced and unexpected visit, we had!!!!!
IMG_5424However, both Darrell and I agreed that this could be another most excellent distraction to help take Hugh’s mind off “’is crisis of zee confidence”, so it was a no brainer that we went ……….
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Again, at first, it was a little hard to gauge Hugh’s enthusiasm, but with a guestroom now full of pickles, jams, marmalades and assorted fudges from yesterday, which Hugh had spent quite a while inspecting and reassigning to his showbiz friends ……….
IMG_5438……… but when he decided to treat himself to and then immediately put on a Scarecrow Festival badge …………..
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…….. availed himself copiously of the free sweeties outside one of the houses
IMG_5441…….. and started helplessly giggling at one of the more risquĂ© scarecrows, I was reassured that we’d got it right, again.
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“Ahhhhhhhh zis is soooooooooooo much fun you boyz!  I am all full of zee excitement for what we will find around zee next corner, no ……….
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……. In Notting ‘ill, we ‘ave no’sing like zis, and if we did my neighbours,  zey vud get zere exclusive designer peoples to make zere scareycrows for zem no! ……..
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…….. I sink, I vud ask you all to come down to me and we vud have zee fun making our own no?  We could even raid all zee old costumes from zee Palladium no, I still ‘ave zee key!  Oooooo la la, I can see it all now!”
IMG_5452Zis  This was all music to my ears ……. Hugh enthusing and getting all starry eyed about things.
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And then, when he spotted a scarecrow wearing a purple LamĂ© trouser suit, he just collapsed and was doubled up with laughter until tears rolled down his face and he had to ask Darrell for a puff of his inhaler …… “O mon, mon, mon, mon dieu” he cried “I ‘ave zat exact same outfit in my wardrobe, it’s what I like to ‘oooooover in, when zee mood takes me!”
IMG_5446…….. and look at next door ….. with zee three pointed headed people with zee bulbous eyes and noses and zee weirdy beardies  ……. it is us, no?”
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When we had all finally composed ourselves enough to walk upright again, Hugh suggested treating us to an aperitif at the local hostelry, and then couldn’t quite believe that the village had even brewed a special Scarecrow Beer to celebrate the festivities.  Well, it would have looked most rude not to quaff several ample samples “out of zee respect”
IMG_5433“Ahhhh boyz, what are you like?  Zis has been soooooooo much fun.   My stomach, it aches so much with all zee laughing no? You ‘ave almost done me in, no!!!!!” he laughed
IMG_5455Yes, I have to agree, we dun gud, very gud indeed!!!!