Darrell has decided that now Comic Relief is now live on BBC 1 and Nigel appears (to some) to have had a pretty easy ride on his Marathon Bush Tucker Trial etc. etc. it was time to ramp up the volume and the pressure on the little fella!
Now, though generally Nigel doesn’t turn his nose up to anything of a comestible type nature, he does have an Achilles heel …… guaranteed to set his gag reflex off with impressive magnitude ……
…….. namely and to wit ….. BROAD BEANS ….. heave isn’t a strong enough word ….. just the thought of them brings him out in a hot and cold sweat …. we don’t know where this mahossive aversion came from, but he is a martyr to it ….. so ….
…. it only seemed natural to Darrell that Nigel should, to show his commitment to the Comic Relief cause, attempt to ingest several of the aforementioned legumes as part of his Marathon Bush Tucker Trail (but indoors and in England & without the grubs & stuff ….. or Ant and Dec) ….
I said that it was incredibly cruel ….. but Darrell insisted that “au contraire” it had the potential to be incredibly funny and thus in keeping with the comedy element of Comic Relief ….. and then when the trial was over Nigel would also experience a robust sensation of “relief” so it was a no brainer!
I counselled Nigel for several minutes …. to see how he felt about the challenge …. and bless him, although turning as green as the aforementioned aforementioned broad beans ….. Nigel said “Bring it on” ….. I have to admit that I had to sniff very deeply indeed in order to hide my overwhelming emotions at Nigel’s dignified and stollic demeanor.
Darrell duly presented Nigel with a small helping of broad beans, Nigel's arch nemesis …. and a cocktail stick with which to serve them. And so, with a mahoooosive intake of breathe, Nigel began his Bush Tucker Trial of Trials ……