We’re very concerned because we’ve heard that there is a national shortage of Marmite! It’s something to do with it being a knock on effect from the breweries not producing as much beer, because of increasing pub closures….. which in turn has resulted in there not being enough yeast by-products left over to make Marmite ……. We are bereft, as it really is our savoury spread of choice and something we enjoy and partake in every single day, including Christmas Day, Birthdays, High Days, Low Days, Away Days and Holy Days ……….
What will we do if we can’t enjoy our daily Dairy Lea spread and Marmite sandwiches? And poor Nigel? He has it on his toast, under his beans …. this is a disaster, the implications incalculatable …. ….
Darrell went down to the SPAR and did the unthinkable …..he bought their entire stock, (both in glass jars and the new squeezable variety). We are not proud. We are deeply ashamed, as we put our own needs before those of others. Believe us, we won’t sleep easy in our beds tonight, for we have left a small village community on the borders of Wolverhampton without Marmite!
Marmite will be spread very thinly from now on …..